Santa Hooked Me Up.

by Dori Nicole

Disclaimer: I’m an adult, ok?

Merry Christmas! I wasn’t expecting this because I arrived back home 2 weeks ago and it was only then that I told my mom I loved Minions and I wanted to find a Minion onesie for my cold ass apartment.

& Santa came through!

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Granted it doesn’t have the minion hood that I envisioned but look at dat ass!

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One in a Minion Booty.

BAM!

I’m a happy girl. I also got the portable stim kit /massager I asked for to help me out with my back spasms while I’m at home or traveling so thats pretty dope.

Remember when I said I was toying with the idea of going back to work in a few months? Well, it was a bad one. My mother is the entertainer/host of the family so whenever a holiday rolls around, she is throwing the party. Which is why I am the way I am when it comes to being hospitable and offering to cook and bake for people… when I am in the mood.

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Yesterday I was baking away and felt like I was at work again, except I had the freedom to sit down whenever I pleased. Still, by the end of the day I was strapped back up in the back brace I thought I would never have to wear again with muscle spasms climbing up my left side. Minor swelling returned in my lower back and I was down for the count. So I guess now I will have to seriously consider a different way of making a living because restaurant work is off the table for a while.

I didn’t want to buy all of the things I needed to make my usual dinner rolls, baguettes or french bread so I made eggnog cookies, snicker doodles, and (the hit of the party) Caramel Pecan Praline Cheesecake bars. With toffee and a little hint of chocolate.

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best desert award.

They look ugly, and I don’t eat sweets so I don’t know how they taste, but judging by the fact that it is the only dessert that was completely gone after only one hour of eating, I guess they were the bomb.

My little sister, following in my footsteps, made a sort of gorgeous yet major heart attack of a cake.

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yikes! Chocolate on chocolate on chocolate… with kit-kats around the perimeter and m&ms on the top. No one has been brave enough to cut it and eat it. Not even her. But she was proud of it and it came out cute.

My mom followed up with a boozy rum cake that my grandmother can’t wait to get drunk off of.

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And because I was feeling myself in my christmas wig and elf hat…

Now that everyone has passed out before me, it is safe to say I am the most sober one. Typically I’m the one who eats the most, gains no weight, and ends up passed out in the back of the house for a couple of hours before stumbling back into the kitchen for seconds and thirds. Now I’ve manage to leave that title behind and stay up well past dinner this year while everyone, including my support dog, is passed out with full bellies on the couch watching the Warriors game. I’m saying this at 4pm… dinner was at 2. Who else has a family who eats especially early during the holidays?

I hope you all are having a great holiday season whatever that means to you!

-Dori.

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